What's (this) ?

Have you ever said to yourself, "Self, if (this) would happen, it would fix my whole life."

Of course, (this) could be many things, such as finding the right spouse, relocating to another city/country, acquiring a fortune, or drastically improving your appearance. It could be something smaller, like getting a different job.

If you're lucky enough to achieve your own personal (this), you might find that you set your expectations too high or set your sights too low.

In my case, (this) was 'giving up wine.' For me that's always been my secret plan. I told myself, "All I have to do is give up wine and I'll feel better immediately. I'll lose weight, the grocery bill will plummet, I won't get tired so early, and there won't be those middle-of-night restroom trips."

Silly me. I mistook 'wineless' for 'Fountain of Youth.' I've been wineless for a week now. I get tired just as soon, and I eat more. I still have to make middle-of-night trips. They're the only trips I can afford to take, because the grocery bill didn't drop at all. Neither has my weight.

We'll see how this plays out, but I suspect my secret plan wasn't very realistic. At my age, feeling better isn't ever guaranteed. Bladder capacity does not change. Weight loss is exponentially more complex for seniors.

Come to think of it, the only time I lost weight, felt better, and spent less on food was when I moved to Miami for a new job. I had a busy work schedule, no kitchen, and a low food budget.

Hmmm... would my life be fixed if my new (this) was to move back to Miami and get a starter job? Ha! No way. What I really need is the 'Fountain of Youth' and it sure isn't in Florida. Ponce de Leon already looked there and gave up. Apparently all he found were retirees, and I can be one of those right here at home!